'Didn't we tell you yesterday Khushii, don't show your face here!! Leave!' Madhumathi whispered harshly as she threw Khushi out of the room Shashi was in. Payal followed behind her.
'Bua ji don't. Please. This is a public place, please Bua ji.' She pleaded.
'That is why I'm telling her to leave. You're beloved sister is the one who is making a spectacle of our family, not me. She was told not to come, then why did she? Have you not done enough, by running us into the ground in Lucknow already with your illicit activities? Now you wish to publicise it here in Delhi too!!' she bellowed, her voice now rising, despite the control she was trying to keep on it.
'Bua ji, please...I just...Bau ji...' Khushi whimpered.
'Di...what's happening?' Arnav whispered, completely agitated with the treatment he saw of Khushi.
'Sshh...Chotay. I was scared that something like this would happen. Poor Khushi.' Anjali moaned sympathetically, as she took a step towards her, but Nani pulled her back.
'No, bitya. This is between their family, if you go over there, they will feel the whole world knows. Stay here, we'll go near her when they have settled down.' Nani cautioned, realizing that their arrival would only worsen the situation rather than better it, for none of the Gupta's had realized they were there, as they had stopped a few doors down from Shashi's suite.
'Stop it! Stop it! You're making a scene Khushi.' Garima had now joined them outside, she too was livid by the presence of her younger daughter.
'Do you want Shashi Babuwa to find out about you're activities and become the cause yet again for his distress?!! Just leave. No one wants you here!' Bua ji blared, now not even trying to restrain her anger or voice. Her love for her brother's health had trumped her fear of being heard by others.
'Amma...' Khushi sobbed as she made to grasp Garima's hand, but that was a big mistake, for it made her anger shoot, causing her to turn and slap her for daring to touch her. The slap echoed around the corridor, as it made Khushi lose her footing and spin away from the door of Shashi's suite and the three women who stood in front of it, into a solid pair of arms.
Arnav jerked around to see who had stopped him from advancing towards the crushed Khushi and found Anjali's ghostly white hand gripping his arm, he looked up to find her shaking her ashen face. She understood his impulse to take Khushi away from her family at this moment but also knew that him going there would mean more trouble for Khushi than help for her: they didn't know who he was, thus if he consoled or defended her that would lead to her family getting even more angry at her. Annoyed, but acknowledging her reason somewhere deep inside he turned back to see who had come to Khushi's rescue, as well as see what the mother had to say for her actions.
Khushi, looked up to see whose warm chest she was enclosed in and was shocked to find it was Aakash. She had half expected to find herself in Arnav's arms, as she generally found herself in his arms whenever distressed. This thought further unsettled her, as to why she had thought of him at this moment. Aakash cupped her face, 'You ok?' he asked soothingly in a voice hoarse with emotion. She managed to give a shocked nod.
Once she had answered him in the affirmative he motioned for Payal to take her sister, while he came to stand in front of her as her protector from her own family. 'What on earth is happening here?' he asked in a controlled whisper.
'Bitwa you don't know what she's done, if you had then you wouldn't want anything to do with her just the way we don't.' Madhumathi stated, as Garima was still staring at her hand, reeling from the shock of what her hand had yet again done to her daughter.
'On the contrary, I know exactly what she has done and what she has gone through, me and Payal have fought over it many a times already, but that doesn't mean I will stand about making a spectacle of it in public places. You are angry at her, fine, I won't stop you from being that way, but at least control it.' He counseled angrily.
'What? You know...and you and Payaliya have had fights due to it...oh you're the gift that just does not stop giving aren't you?!! You wreck your relationship, then become the cause of you're Bauji's illness and now are causing a rift between Payal and Aakash...what will it take for you to stop?!! You know when I took you in, I thought that my upbringing would at least stop you from repeating my Jiji's mistakes, but instead you have exceeded her, she only ran away with her lover, causing problems in our family but you...you...I can't even bring to my lips you're crime, it disgusts me so much. You disgust me Khushi!! Disgust Me! That's why I want you no where near me, or my family!! You are not my daughter and you have proven it. Leave us!!' Garima bawled, losing the cap on her anger completely at the thought of Khushi's actions resulting in a problem in Payal and Aakash's marriage.
'A-Am-ma...' Khushi exclaimed in horror at what her mother had just berated
'Don't! I said don't call me that anymore, you have lost the right to call me Amma! You disgraceful child! Just leave Khushi, we don't want you in our lives anymore. Go!!' she yelled, as she made to advance towards her, but Aakash came in between.
'Amma -' Aakash started at his mother-in-law but stopped as soon as he had began, for out of the corner of his eyes he saw Khushi gliding away in some sort of a trance. 'Khushi...' he pivoted away from Garima's face and called out to Khushi at the same time as Payal, but she didn't stop. She kept walking towards the end of the corridor. Payal hurried behind her, grabbed her hand even, but she didn't grasp back instead let her hands slip out of hers as she continued down the corridor, towards the exit.
As she reached the end of the corridor, Arnav came to stand in front of her. He too tried to stop her, talk to her, but she only stared back at him pathetically, for she was lost in her own mind. He shook her vigorously, which managed to get a single response. A lone tear that flickered from her eye and landed on his hand. The sudden wetness on the back of his palm made him let go of her and look at the drop of pearl that rested there sadly. It wrenched his heart to see the carcass it represented. His Khushi was breaking, right before his eyes and he couldn't do anything about it. When he looked up, to try and get through to her, he found she was gone, in the moment he had taken to look at her precious tear she had fled. Anger pulsating in his veins at the person who had broken her he turned towards her mother, but found someone else had beaten him to it.
'Amma...what were you thinking? Khushi...she...she...Amma why did you have to say that? You don't even know half the things that poor girl has been through these past few months. Amma, you don't even mean what you said, but she will believe it. She has tortured herself over and over again ever since that damned night, do you think she doesn't regret it and instead of trying to understand your daughter...you disowned her?!! You and Bauji are everything to her and you rendered her an orphan yet again. You know how scared she gets from being alone and you thrust her into that very dark hole. How could you?!!' Payal harassed her mother, as anxious tears poured from her eyes.
'Payal...you? You are asking me these questions. You, who haven't even been married four months yet and have had to deal with your husband's anger, due to your sister's mistakes?' Bua ji questioned, appalled at the way she was behaving with her own mother, who herself was shocked by both her daughter's conducts.
'Stop it.' This time it was Aakash who snapped at them. 'Stop blaming her for things that she has nothing to do with. She was not the cause of mine and Payal's rift. Payal was; and that is now sorted as it is. I was never angry at Payal because of what happened to Khushi, I was angry because she didn't treat me as her own. Khushi not telling me about her problems I could let go because she doesn't owe it to me, but Payal, Payal does. I expect her to include me in her problems and she hid it, although eventually it did make sense to me why she did what she did, for it wasn't her truth to tell, it was Khushi's. If Payal had told me then she would have betrayed Khushi's confidence, so it made sense she kept quiet about it.
'Khushi, was not the cause of it.' He repeated again, to drive the point across. 'They are sisters, of course they are going to have conversations that I will not be privy to, it took me some time to understand that, being an only child, but I did, so all is fine between Payal and me. You can't blame Khushi for it, just the way you can't blame Khushi for Bauji, she didn't run the family name into mud in Lucknow that sick man did. She left; she left Lucknow, her home,her family, just to protect you all. If she had not cared about you do you think she would have done any of that? Do you not know you're daughter at all? I have known her what, six/seven months? That much time has been enough to tell me at least this much about her that she would never do anything to hurt any one of you: she is deeply loyal to you all. Her heart beats only for you, in her every heart beat she thinks up of ways to help you, to make you all happy.You are her family and now, just in one instant you disowned her! That girl who lives solely for you, you left her all alone, for a mistake that you all made.' Both Garima and Madhumathi snapped up at that statement, as did Arnav; he stared at Aakash incredulously.
He still remembered that angry face he had worn when he had found out about Khushi's pregnancy two months back and was digesting him coming to Khushi's rescue, as he had assumed the reason for his anger wrongly at that time, when this declaration of his totally derailed him. What was he talking about? How were they all liable for her crime? Just because he had fallen in love with her didn't stop him from understanding she was accountable for wrecking a man's marriage, it just meant that despite her faults he still loved her, which trumped all other feelings he had regarding her. But now this assertion of Aakash's baffled him, how could they all be held responsible for her crime, when clearly both her mother and aunt disapproved of what she had done.
'Yes, you heard me correctly, you all made it, actually we all did, forI made it too: the mistake of trusting that man. For which we are all paying the price, only Khushi had to and still is paying the biggest price of all.' He spat at them sourly. It saddened him how easily they overlooked her pain and were quick to judge her. Agreed they had not seen her at her worst, when her sanity was in question, for the trauma of the one night with Shyam had resulted in her hysterical pregnancy, but still...him, being a man could see her shredded heart and soul, so how could they not? They where her family and more importantly women, didn't that by default mean they should be able to understand her agony better and yet they were the ones who were turning on her? It was sick!
'It's sick.' He muttered after a while, unable to disguise his feelings from them. 'Instead of thinking about what she must be going through all you can think about is what she did. Can you even imagine how she must be feeling right now? Betrayed. Betrayed by everyone she thought to be her own.' He stared at them directly as he pierced their hearts with his words.
'If it wasn't bad enough, getting her heart, her trust broken by her fianc, who also happened to be her best friend, she now got it broken by her family too, the one thing that every human being can count upon: family. They too turned their back's on her, how must she be feeling, can you even imagine? No, you cannot. Because it's something you guys will never understand, not just because you haven't been betrayed, for you have, but because you don't even want to, you're too busy sulking over what she did. Yeah she slept with some guy, who wasn't just some random person may I remind you but her finace, that does make a difference, but still she slept with him which means that she betrayed your trust, so yes that does give you the right to be angry with her, but not to punish her, or to disown her for that matter. Not when you don't even know why she did it in the first place. Did you ever ask her why she did it, the girl who is the most principled person I know committed an unprincipled act, there must have been a reason for that. Did you ask her why?' he glared at them and they shifted their gaze.
'No, none of you did, instead you just gave her a sentence and that too for something you don't even know the reason for.' He continued disgusted by their behavior. 'That's not done. It's not right, not fair. If you're going to punish her then at least hear her side before you give you're verdict. If you as her family have the right to punish her then she too has a right to speak in her defence. A right she didn't ask for or fight for, because you were her family she probably didn't even see why she would have too, only you didn't treat her that way. Instead you crushed her only reason to live: you. Did you see her, just now when she walked out,' he motioned towards the exit. 'No, you didn't did you? I did, and yet I didn't, for that was not Khushi who walked out of this centre. For the woman who trudged out of this place was a mere ghost. The Khushi I knew, who I first met when I came for Payal's hand she was long gone, a part of her was dying ever since the day of our wedding, but there was still a shimmer of her inside that skeleton these past few months, but you blew out that shimmer today with your words. She's gone. You wanted her gone and she is now. Gone.' He ended distastefully, upset with all of them for hurting her. He did not know how or when it had happened, but Khushi had become his sister and his good friend and he hated them all for hurting her. Especially Shyam, who was responsible for her wrecked state today. How he wished to get a hold of his snakey neck and make him pay for the crimes he had committed against his sister and family. He had broken them all, in one swift move. By ruining Khushi he had splintered the whole Gupta family, for she was the backbone of this family: hurt her and you hurt them all.
Arnav felt gutted. What had he thought and who had she turned out to be? Aakash was right, he had never thought to question her for her actions instead had only passed his judgement. Even if he had not stopped to ask her he could have just read it on her face for her truth had always been there in her eyes, only he couldn't see it then, the blinds of prejudice had blurred them but now that they had been removed, he saw her truth as clear as the blue skys on a sunny day. She was not a homewrecker, instead had gotten her own home, her own sanctity wrecked by an impious man. A man who had promised to be her husband only to bed her and then leave her. Oh, how he had wronged her, come to an opinion without even trying to know her. He had labelled her with a sin someone else had committed in his past. He was just as bad as her family, instead of hearing her story he had jumped to his own conclusion. And now, now she was gone. Just like Aakash had said it, gone. He had seen it for himself. No amount of jolting had brought her back, she had disappeared and he was to share the blame for that, for he too had misjudged her.
As this thought played out, a new thought struck him. Where was Khushi? Where had she gone? In his anger at Garima, Madhumati and ultimately himself he had not thought about that even once. She had left NHC in a miserable state. Nothing but numbing pain existing inside of her. He knew a little something about the darkness that pain was able to create, it had tendancy to send its' holder to the extreme. Khushi had been gone for quite a while, where had she gone to, what if she did something? Aakash had said that they, her family, had been the reason for her survival, but now that was taken from her, did that mean...would she...
A new kind of agony punched him at his very core, as he spun on his heel and sprinted to his car, not even hearing Anjali or Nani's cries after him. He finally understood what he had seen in her eyes that night in the Sheesh-Mahal Suite. The thing that had made him stop in his advance and instead recoil, it was this very darkness. The darkness of excruciating pain that came as a direct result of a nefarious betrayal. The darkness that had engulfed him when he had seen his mother take her life right in front of his eyes due to his father's ugly acts.
Khushi was in danger, danger from herself. He had to find her before the darkness consumed her and made her do something that was irreversible, which may make him lose her forever. He had already lost the right to be with her, to love her, for judging her so wickedly, but he couldn't lose his love too. He may not ever earn the honour of becoming her lover but at the least he could do what lover's did and that was save her, protect her from herself. And maybe, if she allowed, let him help heal her frayed heart.
Panic wrecked havoc inside of him, as he drove through the streets of Delhi, desperately trying to locate Khushi. Guilt turned into Fear threatening to come out and suffocate him for his part in the crime of killing the soul of his beloved, but he fought to keep it down. He couldn't let the Shame come out and punish him, not yet: he needed to find Khushi. Fast. He searched every mandir and park he could think of but didn't find her. He howled out in frustration and terror.Where was she?
He called LaANK, but she wasn't there either, well that had been a long shot as it was. How he wished he had payed more attention so that he knew where she went when she was bleeding, but alas even if he had he would have probably arrived at the wrong supposition, he thought sourly, considering none of his prior theories regarding her had panned out correctly. He thought about filing a missing persons' report, but stopped himself before he made the call to the Commissioner of Delhi, knowing full and well what he would say, a person wasn't qualified missing until they had been gone for twenty-four hours and here Khushi had not even been missing for a complete hour yet. Only he knew that if he didn't find her fast then they may have to file that very report soon or worse sign off on a form at the mor- NO!! He wouldn't let that happen. He may not have been able to save Lavanya but that would not be the case with Khushi!
He couldn't get the police force involved until after twenty-four hours but that didn't mean he could not enlist the help of a private eye. He thumbed through his phone for the number of the PI he had once hired to follow Chetan around, in order to make sure he was the right man for Anjali, even though that report had turned out to be bogus for the man had cheated on Anjali three years later, the investigation carried out had been sincere at the time (for not even the best of detectives would be able to discover an affair that had not yet taken place). But the number wasn't in his phone. He cursed.Of couse it wasn't, for he had never fed it into his phone. Cursing again, he took a sharp U-turn and headed home to find the number that was written in his diary.
He parked in the driveway rather than in the lot as he planned on leaving again and bounded round the house to his room. As soon as he rounded the corner he came to a stop. There she was, standing at the edge of the pool, staring at the twilit sky. She was saying something, up at the heavens which he could not quite make out. But he didn't care at that moment. She was there, in front of him. Safe and sound. That's all that mattered. Relief flooded inside of him. She was safe. But something was not right, there was something in the way she stood there, he edged closer to hear what she was saying and caught the last few words she uttered before she began shaking.
'Why did you leave me Amma? Why didn't you just take me with you? I don't belong here, I never have, I was only fooling myself, thinking that I was part of this world, part of a family, I never was...and now, I never will be...'
Dread seized him. She was talking to her mother. Her dead mother. And she was standing right at the edge of the pool, the deep end. She was planning on going to her. He felt sick to his stomach. He had been right, the darkness had pushed her to make an extreme decision, but he couldn't let her do this. He began walking towards her speedily and cautiously at the same time, he didn't want his movements to shock her into doing what she was already deliberating over doing.
'Bua ji don't. Please. This is a public place, please Bua ji.' She pleaded.
'That is why I'm telling her to leave. You're beloved sister is the one who is making a spectacle of our family, not me. She was told not to come, then why did she? Have you not done enough, by running us into the ground in Lucknow already with your illicit activities? Now you wish to publicise it here in Delhi too!!' she bellowed, her voice now rising, despite the control she was trying to keep on it.
'Bua ji, please...I just...Bau ji...' Khushi whimpered.
'Di...what's happening?' Arnav whispered, completely agitated with the treatment he saw of Khushi.
'Sshh...Chotay. I was scared that something like this would happen. Poor Khushi.' Anjali moaned sympathetically, as she took a step towards her, but Nani pulled her back.
'No, bitya. This is between their family, if you go over there, they will feel the whole world knows. Stay here, we'll go near her when they have settled down.' Nani cautioned, realizing that their arrival would only worsen the situation rather than better it, for none of the Gupta's had realized they were there, as they had stopped a few doors down from Shashi's suite.
'Stop it! Stop it! You're making a scene Khushi.' Garima had now joined them outside, she too was livid by the presence of her younger daughter.
'Do you want Shashi Babuwa to find out about you're activities and become the cause yet again for his distress?!! Just leave. No one wants you here!' Bua ji blared, now not even trying to restrain her anger or voice. Her love for her brother's health had trumped her fear of being heard by others.
'Amma...' Khushi sobbed as she made to grasp Garima's hand, but that was a big mistake, for it made her anger shoot, causing her to turn and slap her for daring to touch her. The slap echoed around the corridor, as it made Khushi lose her footing and spin away from the door of Shashi's suite and the three women who stood in front of it, into a solid pair of arms.
Arnav jerked around to see who had stopped him from advancing towards the crushed Khushi and found Anjali's ghostly white hand gripping his arm, he looked up to find her shaking her ashen face. She understood his impulse to take Khushi away from her family at this moment but also knew that him going there would mean more trouble for Khushi than help for her: they didn't know who he was, thus if he consoled or defended her that would lead to her family getting even more angry at her. Annoyed, but acknowledging her reason somewhere deep inside he turned back to see who had come to Khushi's rescue, as well as see what the mother had to say for her actions.
Khushi, looked up to see whose warm chest she was enclosed in and was shocked to find it was Aakash. She had half expected to find herself in Arnav's arms, as she generally found herself in his arms whenever distressed. This thought further unsettled her, as to why she had thought of him at this moment. Aakash cupped her face, 'You ok?' he asked soothingly in a voice hoarse with emotion. She managed to give a shocked nod.
Once she had answered him in the affirmative he motioned for Payal to take her sister, while he came to stand in front of her as her protector from her own family. 'What on earth is happening here?' he asked in a controlled whisper.
'Bitwa you don't know what she's done, if you had then you wouldn't want anything to do with her just the way we don't.' Madhumathi stated, as Garima was still staring at her hand, reeling from the shock of what her hand had yet again done to her daughter.
'On the contrary, I know exactly what she has done and what she has gone through, me and Payal have fought over it many a times already, but that doesn't mean I will stand about making a spectacle of it in public places. You are angry at her, fine, I won't stop you from being that way, but at least control it.' He counseled angrily.
'What? You know...and you and Payaliya have had fights due to it...oh you're the gift that just does not stop giving aren't you?!! You wreck your relationship, then become the cause of you're Bauji's illness and now are causing a rift between Payal and Aakash...what will it take for you to stop?!! You know when I took you in, I thought that my upbringing would at least stop you from repeating my Jiji's mistakes, but instead you have exceeded her, she only ran away with her lover, causing problems in our family but you...you...I can't even bring to my lips you're crime, it disgusts me so much. You disgust me Khushi!! Disgust Me! That's why I want you no where near me, or my family!! You are not my daughter and you have proven it. Leave us!!' Garima bawled, losing the cap on her anger completely at the thought of Khushi's actions resulting in a problem in Payal and Aakash's marriage.
'A-Am-ma...' Khushi exclaimed in horror at what her mother had just berated
'Don't! I said don't call me that anymore, you have lost the right to call me Amma! You disgraceful child! Just leave Khushi, we don't want you in our lives anymore. Go!!' she yelled, as she made to advance towards her, but Aakash came in between.
'Amma -' Aakash started at his mother-in-law but stopped as soon as he had began, for out of the corner of his eyes he saw Khushi gliding away in some sort of a trance. 'Khushi...' he pivoted away from Garima's face and called out to Khushi at the same time as Payal, but she didn't stop. She kept walking towards the end of the corridor. Payal hurried behind her, grabbed her hand even, but she didn't grasp back instead let her hands slip out of hers as she continued down the corridor, towards the exit.
As she reached the end of the corridor, Arnav came to stand in front of her. He too tried to stop her, talk to her, but she only stared back at him pathetically, for she was lost in her own mind. He shook her vigorously, which managed to get a single response. A lone tear that flickered from her eye and landed on his hand. The sudden wetness on the back of his palm made him let go of her and look at the drop of pearl that rested there sadly. It wrenched his heart to see the carcass it represented. His Khushi was breaking, right before his eyes and he couldn't do anything about it. When he looked up, to try and get through to her, he found she was gone, in the moment he had taken to look at her precious tear she had fled. Anger pulsating in his veins at the person who had broken her he turned towards her mother, but found someone else had beaten him to it.
'Amma...what were you thinking? Khushi...she...she...Amma why did you have to say that? You don't even know half the things that poor girl has been through these past few months. Amma, you don't even mean what you said, but she will believe it. She has tortured herself over and over again ever since that damned night, do you think she doesn't regret it and instead of trying to understand your daughter...you disowned her?!! You and Bauji are everything to her and you rendered her an orphan yet again. You know how scared she gets from being alone and you thrust her into that very dark hole. How could you?!!' Payal harassed her mother, as anxious tears poured from her eyes.
'Payal...you? You are asking me these questions. You, who haven't even been married four months yet and have had to deal with your husband's anger, due to your sister's mistakes?' Bua ji questioned, appalled at the way she was behaving with her own mother, who herself was shocked by both her daughter's conducts.
'Stop it.' This time it was Aakash who snapped at them. 'Stop blaming her for things that she has nothing to do with. She was not the cause of mine and Payal's rift. Payal was; and that is now sorted as it is. I was never angry at Payal because of what happened to Khushi, I was angry because she didn't treat me as her own. Khushi not telling me about her problems I could let go because she doesn't owe it to me, but Payal, Payal does. I expect her to include me in her problems and she hid it, although eventually it did make sense to me why she did what she did, for it wasn't her truth to tell, it was Khushi's. If Payal had told me then she would have betrayed Khushi's confidence, so it made sense she kept quiet about it.
'Khushi, was not the cause of it.' He repeated again, to drive the point across. 'They are sisters, of course they are going to have conversations that I will not be privy to, it took me some time to understand that, being an only child, but I did, so all is fine between Payal and me. You can't blame Khushi for it, just the way you can't blame Khushi for Bauji, she didn't run the family name into mud in Lucknow that sick man did. She left; she left Lucknow, her home,her family, just to protect you all. If she had not cared about you do you think she would have done any of that? Do you not know you're daughter at all? I have known her what, six/seven months? That much time has been enough to tell me at least this much about her that she would never do anything to hurt any one of you: she is deeply loyal to you all. Her heart beats only for you, in her every heart beat she thinks up of ways to help you, to make you all happy.You are her family and now, just in one instant you disowned her! That girl who lives solely for you, you left her all alone, for a mistake that you all made.' Both Garima and Madhumathi snapped up at that statement, as did Arnav; he stared at Aakash incredulously.
He still remembered that angry face he had worn when he had found out about Khushi's pregnancy two months back and was digesting him coming to Khushi's rescue, as he had assumed the reason for his anger wrongly at that time, when this declaration of his totally derailed him. What was he talking about? How were they all liable for her crime? Just because he had fallen in love with her didn't stop him from understanding she was accountable for wrecking a man's marriage, it just meant that despite her faults he still loved her, which trumped all other feelings he had regarding her. But now this assertion of Aakash's baffled him, how could they all be held responsible for her crime, when clearly both her mother and aunt disapproved of what she had done.
'Yes, you heard me correctly, you all made it, actually we all did, forI made it too: the mistake of trusting that man. For which we are all paying the price, only Khushi had to and still is paying the biggest price of all.' He spat at them sourly. It saddened him how easily they overlooked her pain and were quick to judge her. Agreed they had not seen her at her worst, when her sanity was in question, for the trauma of the one night with Shyam had resulted in her hysterical pregnancy, but still...him, being a man could see her shredded heart and soul, so how could they not? They where her family and more importantly women, didn't that by default mean they should be able to understand her agony better and yet they were the ones who were turning on her? It was sick!
'It's sick.' He muttered after a while, unable to disguise his feelings from them. 'Instead of thinking about what she must be going through all you can think about is what she did. Can you even imagine how she must be feeling right now? Betrayed. Betrayed by everyone she thought to be her own.' He stared at them directly as he pierced their hearts with his words.
'If it wasn't bad enough, getting her heart, her trust broken by her fianc, who also happened to be her best friend, she now got it broken by her family too, the one thing that every human being can count upon: family. They too turned their back's on her, how must she be feeling, can you even imagine? No, you cannot. Because it's something you guys will never understand, not just because you haven't been betrayed, for you have, but because you don't even want to, you're too busy sulking over what she did. Yeah she slept with some guy, who wasn't just some random person may I remind you but her finace, that does make a difference, but still she slept with him which means that she betrayed your trust, so yes that does give you the right to be angry with her, but not to punish her, or to disown her for that matter. Not when you don't even know why she did it in the first place. Did you ever ask her why she did it, the girl who is the most principled person I know committed an unprincipled act, there must have been a reason for that. Did you ask her why?' he glared at them and they shifted their gaze.
'No, none of you did, instead you just gave her a sentence and that too for something you don't even know the reason for.' He continued disgusted by their behavior. 'That's not done. It's not right, not fair. If you're going to punish her then at least hear her side before you give you're verdict. If you as her family have the right to punish her then she too has a right to speak in her defence. A right she didn't ask for or fight for, because you were her family she probably didn't even see why she would have too, only you didn't treat her that way. Instead you crushed her only reason to live: you. Did you see her, just now when she walked out,' he motioned towards the exit. 'No, you didn't did you? I did, and yet I didn't, for that was not Khushi who walked out of this centre. For the woman who trudged out of this place was a mere ghost. The Khushi I knew, who I first met when I came for Payal's hand she was long gone, a part of her was dying ever since the day of our wedding, but there was still a shimmer of her inside that skeleton these past few months, but you blew out that shimmer today with your words. She's gone. You wanted her gone and she is now. Gone.' He ended distastefully, upset with all of them for hurting her. He did not know how or when it had happened, but Khushi had become his sister and his good friend and he hated them all for hurting her. Especially Shyam, who was responsible for her wrecked state today. How he wished to get a hold of his snakey neck and make him pay for the crimes he had committed against his sister and family. He had broken them all, in one swift move. By ruining Khushi he had splintered the whole Gupta family, for she was the backbone of this family: hurt her and you hurt them all.
Arnav felt gutted. What had he thought and who had she turned out to be? Aakash was right, he had never thought to question her for her actions instead had only passed his judgement. Even if he had not stopped to ask her he could have just read it on her face for her truth had always been there in her eyes, only he couldn't see it then, the blinds of prejudice had blurred them but now that they had been removed, he saw her truth as clear as the blue skys on a sunny day. She was not a homewrecker, instead had gotten her own home, her own sanctity wrecked by an impious man. A man who had promised to be her husband only to bed her and then leave her. Oh, how he had wronged her, come to an opinion without even trying to know her. He had labelled her with a sin someone else had committed in his past. He was just as bad as her family, instead of hearing her story he had jumped to his own conclusion. And now, now she was gone. Just like Aakash had said it, gone. He had seen it for himself. No amount of jolting had brought her back, she had disappeared and he was to share the blame for that, for he too had misjudged her.
As this thought played out, a new thought struck him. Where was Khushi? Where had she gone? In his anger at Garima, Madhumati and ultimately himself he had not thought about that even once. She had left NHC in a miserable state. Nothing but numbing pain existing inside of her. He knew a little something about the darkness that pain was able to create, it had tendancy to send its' holder to the extreme. Khushi had been gone for quite a while, where had she gone to, what if she did something? Aakash had said that they, her family, had been the reason for her survival, but now that was taken from her, did that mean...would she...
A new kind of agony punched him at his very core, as he spun on his heel and sprinted to his car, not even hearing Anjali or Nani's cries after him. He finally understood what he had seen in her eyes that night in the Sheesh-Mahal Suite. The thing that had made him stop in his advance and instead recoil, it was this very darkness. The darkness of excruciating pain that came as a direct result of a nefarious betrayal. The darkness that had engulfed him when he had seen his mother take her life right in front of his eyes due to his father's ugly acts.
Khushi was in danger, danger from herself. He had to find her before the darkness consumed her and made her do something that was irreversible, which may make him lose her forever. He had already lost the right to be with her, to love her, for judging her so wickedly, but he couldn't lose his love too. He may not ever earn the honour of becoming her lover but at the least he could do what lover's did and that was save her, protect her from herself. And maybe, if she allowed, let him help heal her frayed heart.
Panic wrecked havoc inside of him, as he drove through the streets of Delhi, desperately trying to locate Khushi. Guilt turned into Fear threatening to come out and suffocate him for his part in the crime of killing the soul of his beloved, but he fought to keep it down. He couldn't let the Shame come out and punish him, not yet: he needed to find Khushi. Fast. He searched every mandir and park he could think of but didn't find her. He howled out in frustration and terror.Where was she?
He called LaANK, but she wasn't there either, well that had been a long shot as it was. How he wished he had payed more attention so that he knew where she went when she was bleeding, but alas even if he had he would have probably arrived at the wrong supposition, he thought sourly, considering none of his prior theories regarding her had panned out correctly. He thought about filing a missing persons' report, but stopped himself before he made the call to the Commissioner of Delhi, knowing full and well what he would say, a person wasn't qualified missing until they had been gone for twenty-four hours and here Khushi had not even been missing for a complete hour yet. Only he knew that if he didn't find her fast then they may have to file that very report soon or worse sign off on a form at the mor- NO!! He wouldn't let that happen. He may not have been able to save Lavanya but that would not be the case with Khushi!
He couldn't get the police force involved until after twenty-four hours but that didn't mean he could not enlist the help of a private eye. He thumbed through his phone for the number of the PI he had once hired to follow Chetan around, in order to make sure he was the right man for Anjali, even though that report had turned out to be bogus for the man had cheated on Anjali three years later, the investigation carried out had been sincere at the time (for not even the best of detectives would be able to discover an affair that had not yet taken place). But the number wasn't in his phone. He cursed.Of couse it wasn't, for he had never fed it into his phone. Cursing again, he took a sharp U-turn and headed home to find the number that was written in his diary.
He parked in the driveway rather than in the lot as he planned on leaving again and bounded round the house to his room. As soon as he rounded the corner he came to a stop. There she was, standing at the edge of the pool, staring at the twilit sky. She was saying something, up at the heavens which he could not quite make out. But he didn't care at that moment. She was there, in front of him. Safe and sound. That's all that mattered. Relief flooded inside of him. She was safe. But something was not right, there was something in the way she stood there, he edged closer to hear what she was saying and caught the last few words she uttered before she began shaking.
'Why did you leave me Amma? Why didn't you just take me with you? I don't belong here, I never have, I was only fooling myself, thinking that I was part of this world, part of a family, I never was...and now, I never will be...'
Dread seized him. She was talking to her mother. Her dead mother. And she was standing right at the edge of the pool, the deep end. She was planning on going to her. He felt sick to his stomach. He had been right, the darkness had pushed her to make an extreme decision, but he couldn't let her do this. He began walking towards her speedily and cautiously at the same time, he didn't want his movements to shock her into doing what she was already deliberating over doing.
*****
RSS Feed
